IX is Enough

Miss me?

I have gotten back into Final Fantasy IX, possibly the most overlooked of the "regular" Final Fantasy games(MMOORRPPGG Final Fantasy XI doesn't count, nor do any of the other "freak" titles like Mystic Quest, Crystal Chronicles, X-2 or any of the exceeding lame VII spin-offs). After the more "adult" themes of VII and VIII (adult by visual design only, best as I can tell), IX is a throwback to the swords-and-sorcery roots of the series, with castles, airships, mages and knights, among other conventions. However, in keeping with the traditions of the other two PS1 Final Fantasy games (VII and VIII), the story is borderline ludicrous, an extremely-difficult-to-follow mess about dual civilizations and harvesting souls and magic beings called "eidolons" (read: summons, guardian forces, espers, etc). Please don't try to explain it to me, either; if it has to be explained by a third party, then it's a bad story. Live with it.

But the game is good. I guess that's the thing about Final Fantasy; the games play so well (to me) that I can look past the story elements (or lack of cohesion of such) and just enjoy the game. Yeah, all that tedious level-grinding and seeking of rare items and trying to get this thing or that thing after hours of set-up and effort? I like that stuff. Don't ask me to explain why. I don't feel like I have to justify my likes or dislikes to anyone for any reason.

There are two things that must be said about Final Fantasy IX, for they are absolutes. The first is that Tetra Master, the trading card game within the game, positively blows. It's played similar to the card game from VIII (which was excellent and VERY addictive), only with a bizarre set of rules that are never made inherantly clear. In fact, at several points in the game, NPCs (non-playable characters) will flat-out TELL you that the numbers and indicators scrawled across the cards are not undertsood by anyone within the game! You know they mean something, but you'll never be told, and everytime I think I've got it, it turns out to be wrong. Sure, I could look it up on the Intertron, but I shouldn't have to. No card game should have rules that oblique.

The second absolute is that this game contains one of my all-time favorite video game quotes, a statement made even more profound given that it's delivered by Final Fantasy IX's most bizarre cast member, the frog-like, tongue-wagging Quina Qu, who speaks thus:

“Why you care about small things? World very simple place. World only have two things: Things you can eat and things you no can eat.”

Accomplishment

After several attempts to talk myself out of it, I actually went to a social function last night. Even with all the work we've done to conquer it, a touch of the social anxiety still remains, and it probably wouldn't have manifested itself at all if D were there (she's out of town this week). But I still went, and had a pretty good time. I also found myself far less intimidated by the presence of children, for once, and enjoyed watching them and chatting about them.

One of our friends is having a baby this very day, if she hasn't already by the time I've written this. I always like to see her, even though I don't know her very well. She reminds me very strongly of an old friend of mine who -- this is pleasant -- died a few years ago. She sounds like her, she has the same energetic air about her, she even looks like her. I always smile when I see her, but it's an unusual feeling, almost sad. Is that weird or have other people experienced this sort of thing?

So, games. The slow season is about to give way to the deluge, and I somehow must come up with the money to purchase all these little goodies over the next four months:

Contact
Dragon Quest Heroes: Rocket Slime
Mega Man ZX
Capcom Mini Mix
StarFox Command
Mario vs Donkey Kong 2
Super Paper Mario
Children of Mana
Final Fantasy III
Final Fantasy V Advance
Final Fantasy XII (picking up on a theme here?)
Pokémon Mystery Dungeon
Pokémon Ranger
Zelda: Twilight Princess
Kirby Squeak Squad
Yoshi's Island 2
Castlevania: Portrait of Ruin
Capcom Classics Collection Vol. 2
Taito Legends Vol. 2

And that doesn't even take the Wii into account, nor the half-dozen or so DS games that are already out but I never got for some reason or the other (Animal Crossing, Big Brain Academy, Metroid Prime Hunters, etc).

So, if anyone wants to throw a little extra cash my way, I will be glad to perform any services you may require, within reason. And by "within reason", I mean that no, I won't wear the Raggedy Andy wig. 'Til then, I think I'm going to run through Final Fantasy IX again; I've only played through it once, and that was many years ago.

A Mind Rot Exposé: Does John Hester Truly, Truly Rock?

I guess so. A little. Maybe.

Scraps

At Sensei Adams' behest, I am updating my blog.

Since his is replete with stories of exercise and personal health, I thought I would share my own experience. With D out of town frequently this past month and little else to do when she's not around, I have gotten back on the treadmill, and so far it has been a successful venture: every time I have gotten on, I have managed to stay on for a full half-hour, which is a lot when you're as out-of-shape as I am. The problem isn't doing it, it's making myself do it. I just got a new MP3 player, and it really is making it a lot more fun.

Denise and I finally saw Cars a few weekends ago, and it defeated all my expectation by being excellent, far more than I could have hoped for from the lackluster trailers.

Some time this week, I will get the eighth season of The Simpsons on DVD. We're talkin' The Springfield Files, Sherry Bobbins, Scorpio, Laddie, the Spin-Off Showcase, Lisa in military school, Sideshow Bob and Sideshow Cecil, Ned institutionalized, Nelson in love and some of the other best moments in the show's history.

No new games to talk about; it'll be about another month before the next ones I want are released, and in typical fashion they're all coming out at once, conclusively proving that Nintendo hates me and only likes me for my money. And that black eye I had last month? Nintendo wants you to believe that I "walked into a door."

I don't have anything else to write. Next time on Mind Rot: does John Hester truly, truly rock? Or is it all a sham?

The decision

I can't tell you how many "books" I've put together over the years, but I've finally decided to publish one, or at least attempt to. It will be titled "Screamerz and Doorknobz Cover Collection", and that is exactly what it will be: a nicely bound-and-printed collection of the covers to all 78+ episodes, with a sample page from each and additional commentary on the episode. It will quick and simple, a coffee table book for those with little self-consciousness concerning their household furnishings.

I plan to send an email out soon to guage any interest in such an undertaking... so, in the meantime, tell me, what do you think? Would you spend actual, American dollars on my book? Or am I wasting my time?